I fucking hate Fedex.

Why?

Ah. They never find my house, and they never make the pretense of trying to find out. UPS shouldn't even advertise. They should simply start a service where they find out where the fuck FedEx dropped your package, and then cart the goddamned thing to where it really belongs.

The fucking package even had my phone number on it. But, the old bat who moved into the house below told them I moved half way across the country.

Why the fuck would a package come FedEx for me if I moved? Mail, I get. Some cocksucker at Adelphia will be sending me deaththreats the day after I die because I still refuse to pay that bill. Cocksuckers. Don't give me three different bill amounts and three different dates and then treat me like shit on the phone.

But, Adelphia's a whole other ball of wax. And if you haven't gotten the fuck away from them, then you're probably a goddamned sheep to the slaughter anyhow.

Then a couple months ago, the dumb fuckers decided to drop the package at a street address that sure as hell wasn't mine. The number didn't even completely match!

And of course my homeboys at Airborne. They left my computer part to bake in the sun at an abandoned house. And apparently the vacant home got a secretary according to the tracking info.

Lazy fucks.